Conflict and Fire (Keep Your Light Burning)

Well, the Olympics are over (sigh) and what a grand couple of weeks we’ve had watching the real-life drama play out before our eyes. We witnessed so many stories of triumph and tragedy, hope and disappointment.

It was bittersweet for me to watch the big moment last night when the Olympic flame was extinguished.

The flame was a reminder to me that something bigger than our individual lives was taking place, and seeing it burning brightly evoked inspiration and energy. Watching the torch grow dark was a sad goodbye.

As I gazed at my tv, I couldn’t help but think of how often there are situations in our lives when we feel our own light go dark, when our love, warmth and passion are extinguished.   

Certainly relational conflict can be one of those times. All too often, the actions of the person with whom you are in conflict can result in your feeling diminished.  

Others may communicate that your desires are subordinate to what they want. Perhaps you find yourself losing self-control and becoming someone you don’t want to be. Maybe you are the one who uses the strategy of invalidating others in order to manipulate them.

Keeping your flame burning in your relational interactions is critical to both your success in resolution and your ability to walk away from a difficult situation with no regrets. 

It doesn't take much to do this:

Be convinced your thoughts, desires and goals are of equal importance with the others in the conflict, and keep them “on the table."

Continue to interact with behaviors that are authentically you; learn ways to stay in control.

Make the effort to help others keep their lamp lit as you work out solutions (this will fan your own flame).

Although we had to say goodbye to the Rio Olympic flame, don’t say goodbye to the flame of all that is good in you -- even in conflict.

Keep your fire ignited and burn, baby, burn!

DrK

If you'd like to know more about keeping your light burning in conflict, contact me at
confidentconflict.com for a complimentary conversation!

"12 Ways to Rule in Conflict" Free Download

 
PS. I have no idea where all the code below came from! Technology, arrghhhh!

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